I can't even remember the last time I wrote something, so many things have passed since then. So many. So many good, so many bad. So many I forgot, so many I'll never forget. I left and I came back, one time phisically, so many times mentally. Time ago something went wrong, once more. But these days, under the sun, under the rain...I finally (at least I hope so) I understood so many things. I finally understood which ghosts thay come out some times, when its not me who is talking. And why. It's not late, I'll take it for the next time...for the next time...everything I built, everything I dreamed it felt down once more, this time I'll just build for me, for my soul.

I dont pain anymore, I have something new I never had before, I feel empty, truly empty, unnable to feel anything, good or bad. My lips smile many times, a reflection of an image. I want to smile, I can and I do it...but I cant feel...I just need to get my feelings back, because for so much time I gave all this feelings to someone else, now I must learn to feel for me, to share them with me.

After all the storms and the rain, after the routine, after so many fights, so many...I can finally stand up, knowing that I did what I did for a reason, Ill not take anything back, it happened, it cannot be changed...sometimes you win, sometimes you lose...

I dont dare to say I'm back, I think I am, not sure 100% but more less I am, with a lot of things that broke, with a lot of things that will never be the same, for bad & good.

Starting again, onece more...but this time on my own, Ill make every effort in every direction, now its my life, truly my life, Ill do what I have to do...